We're from the government and we're here to save the Erf....

With Wednesday being Erf Day and me being too incredibly broke to celebrate Erf Day how I traditionally do it (leaving every light in the house on and letting my truck run for 24 hours without turning it off), I started thinking about how we could do something really meaningful this Erf Day.

Here's my plan:

Everyone in Washington, D.C. gets their electricity turned off for 24 hours.  I know it's hot...I know that media outlets have to report on stupid things...but, hey, it's Erf Day.  We have to get some skin in the game.  I figure that D.C. doing without for 24 hours will probably save countless barrels of oil, millions of cubic feet of natural gas, a breeze or two blowing in from the Atlantic and maybe a few rays of sunshine....give it up for the Erf.

So, I thought that was a pretty good idea...I mean, saving is the name of the game...but then someone mentioned "green house gasses," and I was like "darn--I didn't address those directly."  So, here's what I came up with (in less than 30 seconds!) to address carbon dioxide emissions:

Everyone who lives or works in Washington, D.C., and has secured their job either through an election or by being appointed by someone who was elected--y'all get to hold your breath for 24 hours.  There, done--think of the carbon emissions I just saved!!

Remember elected officials...no cheating!!